The Shoulds

Welp. This is not how I saw the first day of a new month unfolding.

It’s July 1st and the energy I had bursting through my veins last week to expose my artwork is now a low, fearful whisper. Today, I was going to Tigger jump into the new month by planning out + thinking out all my creative ideas, inspirations, and what I want my next painting to feel like. Color selections, textures, all the things.

What do you do when the grand ideas do not land on the day you planned for the grand ideas to march in? God is smiling.

I keep staring at this damn screen thinking an IG post will create a spark. Nope. A Subdstack author I admire will inspire a new thread. Not today. I’m blocked. Lifeless. Throw me to the curb! My trash is someone else’s treasure.

My inner voice: Not today, Goat, not today…

I reference a goat because I’m a Capricorn, not the greatest of all time. However, I think most Caps secretly like to think they are. Am I wrong? It’s what keeps us climbing the mountain.

I’m going to stop shoulding on myself.

I’m going to paint. No plan attached.

With love,

Megan